Tuesday, October 30, 2012

post hurricane home practice

My experience of the hurricane was mostly annoyance beforehand - why are they closing the subway- again!, and also - why are they cutting my feldenkrais training weekend short! followed by slightly stir crazy feelings waiting for the storm to show up. Yeah, not too yogic, I know. I did take a lovely walk with T in my neighborhood late Sunday night. No sign of rain, yet almost no one was out, and very little was open: the 24 hour supermarket by my apartment building, the bodegas, and twin donut plus (wonder what that plus refers too..). Where I live in upper manhattan, the storm was mostly a lot of spooky sounding wind (that's what I get for living on top of a hill and facing northeast). My apartment sounded like it was making haunted house sounds

..aaaaooowwwooooohhhhhhhh.... aaaawwwooooooooooollllhhhhhhhhh

Maybe it was the radiator pipes or some such thing. I only hear it when it is very windy. I must admit, I am a complete wimp about this stuff, and had to retreat to the only part of my apartment at times that didnt have a window. Still, Irene last year seemed worse in that respect.

I know I was lucky: I didn't even lose power and there is no flooding in this area of the city. I just have the inconvenience of no subway for a few days as well as a few days off from work. Though what seems like a holiday for me, is not for many in the city and in the metro area.

So, back to the mat:

Today was my first practice after 3 days off, as ladies' holiday showed up on Sunday. I could have even taken today off, but I felt like I really needed to practice. I had a bit of a weepy start during the standing poses, but things evened out for me after that. I managed to fully bind supta K on my own, the trick for me seems to be - don't worry about looking ridiculous in order to get the hands to bind- sort of a rocking back and forth to get my arms and legs in position - sort of reminds me of the side to side in parsva dhanurasana, and then once I grab my fingers, waiting till there is space for my ankles to cross. Last part is the relief I feel when I lift up. The exit was, well, fuggeddaboutit..somehow I am terrified of trying those exits at home, as if the furniture will attack my feet or something. 

I have been thinking a lot about the recent terrific post at the confluence countdown, on holding students back, and I guess what was interesting to me was the idea of getting something enough to move on, vs. mastery (or maybe I should say meeting a certain phyical standard - ie. binding in mari D) in order to move on. I would definitely say my teacher falls into the first camp rather than the second. I also see people working into second without needing to stand up from a backbend (whew). I have noticed with the poses in primary, that each new pose seems to help, almost by osmosis, the poses before it. For my practice to look pretty, that would take years, but that is not really all that important to me. Stability, stamina, even-ness of breath, bandhas(whatever they are), and quieting my eyes and my mind, all seem much more important than whether I can do a pretty lift up and jump back from supta K. There is plenty of time for these things to improve, if i just try my best to pay attention to what I am doing.

hope everyone is safe and dry.

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