One of the reasons I love living in new york city. They tasted like a slightly sweeter (ok, maybe much sweeter) peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Last night, my friend and I celebrated the unseasonably warm day...with a long walk through lower manhattan, and doughnuts.
Since I last wrote, I have been at the shala on monday and wednesday; two practices that could not have been more different. Monday I woke to the sound of jackhammering on the sidewalk, to make spaces for street trees outside my building. The sounds of construction followed me to my practice: there was some noisy demolition/construction going on next door. Monday ended up being a short and worry filled practice, with me worrying about my injury, and feeling frustated and needy about wanting more in the way of teaching and/or assistance. I remember going through this phase with led vinyasa classes, wanting more assists and thinking, why can't I get assisted in this or that pose, like the world revolves around my practice. (Is blogging my new outlet for this feeling? I don't know) I don't know quite when I began to let that go (not that it doesn't still come up sometimes). Interesting too that as my attitude sucked, so also did my breath. These short practices have been much more trying and tiring emotionally.
Wednesday, I decided that I would test out the ankle again and try to do more of my practice (ok, yes, patience not a virtue of mine, but also I have this nagging feeling like the very poses I am avoiding are what I most need to do to heal this once and for all..though it may be a long recovery). Somehow my breath was much smoother (rest day in between? better attitude? better diet?) despite not enough sleep, which gave me confidence to continue. I ended up doing my full practice, and it felt ok, though I am nervous about doing that every practice from now on. My main distraction was the clock in the room. I was running late already, and I kept checking to see how much time I had (though my "rushing" practices are often no shorter than non-rushing practices)...oh well, there is always next time.